The Substance Abuse Police

-The Million Dollar Note

I’ve loved this singer since I was knee-high to a spring lamb. Her's was the first album I ever bought (it was on cassette), and I gotta let you know, some of the tracks on her new album – I Look To You – especially: I Didn’t Know My Own Strength, have made me feel like I can survive the ghastly–can’t wait for it to be over–MOTHER SUCKER of a year that was 2009. Plus, she’s put the whole album on-line for people to listen to for free (none of that “SAMPLE” shit some other artists are dropping). 


Yeah, sometimes she does come-off like she’s got a bad case of ABWS (Angry Black Woman Syndrome). And yeah, she’s defo smoked a fair few woolahs in her time. But which self-respecting rock star hasn’t? I just think it’s funny, is’all, the way everyone turns into the Substance Abuse Police when critiquing Whitney  – when Mick Jagger, Steven Tyler, Bob Dylan and Ozzy Osbourne all, more often than not, fly under the radar.

So let me set out my stall…

I don’t care if she’s jacked-up on crack, doing more lines than a Westminster traffic-warden, bombing speed like gumdrops or she decides to put a free woolah in every CD of her next "greatest hits" compilation. – I don’t! I don’t care if she cops an attitude with Dermot O’Leary or decides to join the Blue Panthers (a more radicalized version of the Black Panthers) tomorrow. – I don’t! In fact, I kinda like her anger – it’s a good anger (like the swagger of football fans). Thing is, I’m buying her music – not going to Sefton Park for a fucking teddy bears’ picnic wiv her.

If I had some spare money right now, one of the first things I’d buy would be: second row, centre stage seats for a homie and I to see her live at the MEN Arena (even though it galls all hell outta me that she ain’t doing the Liverpool Echo Arena…fix-up Whitney – that’s a no-no, boo boo!) in 2010. – I would! I’ve never seen her live before, and as far as I’m concerned that woman is a vessel of God. 

So you go on girl with yo badass self, and next time you’re in the UK, come holla at ya girl & the Merseyside Massive (aka the North-Westsiders). Cos you, Whitney – Buubbie Brown – Houston, are undoubtedly and categorically one of my personal and life-long ambitions; and there ain’t a thing you can do about it to change my mind (no-matter how hard you try).

Stick that in your crack pipe and smoke it! Cos my ambition, Whitney, was not built to break…

- Cheyelle

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