– The dull, the mad and the fugly
So, with Oxygen’s Bad Girls Club coming to its finale next week, and in honour of the young women whose ridiculous antics have entertained me up here in Omar Towers. Here is a quick rundown of the show’s leading ladies and links to the videos that contain their defining moments.
Ready? Let’s do it…
- Natalie “I run LA” Nunn: Machiavellian, desperate and ignant [sic]. If she were white, I’m pretty sure she would have confessed to being another of Tiger Woods’ fuck-buddies by now (whether she’d fucked him or not). Entertaining, but for all the wrong reasons.
- Kate aka Malibu Barbie: Definitive proof Aileen Wuornos is probably a better role model for young girls than Barbie – meretricious, meretricious, meretricious. She was labeled a racist after she refused to go to a nightclub because she didn’t want to go to, “…A sweaty, black place.” Who cares? – An unintelligent racist is about as dangerous as having unprotected sex with a Ken doll.
- Flo the bisexual Albanian-New Yorker: Built like a Russian shot-putter, wouldn’t look out of place as an extra in Million Dollar Baby; she had all the finesse of a transatlantic cargo ship. Started off cool, but then broke her ankle after she got pushed in the pool during a fight with one of the other house-hos. She limped on, but soon had a nervous breakdown and hobbled back to Yonkers – but not before the other girls water-bombed her ass on the way out.
- Kendra: the 21st century’s version of Shug Avery (The Colour Purple) – only without the charm, the soul or the talent. She was the prettiest one. It’s just a shame she couldn’t resist spitting at people – seriously, the girl was like LA’s answer to the Trevi Fountain.
- Then there was the fat one, the dull one, the baby-muffa and the one whose name escapes me for all the right reasons.
Bravo ladies! You weren’t better than a Charles Bukowski book or a Tennessee Williams play, but you certainly put on a good show. I was going to write to the BBC to ask them to do a British version – then I realized, we already had it…it's called Buckingham Palace: The Fergie Years.
- Cheyelle Omar
Mission Statement
Click here for the Bad Girls Club season 4 in its entirety.
COPYRIGHT ©2010 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED: CHEYELLE OMAR
Posts
I was planning to make a few astute anthropological observations about these females until I clicked on one of the You Tube excerpts and heard the line "Don't touch my vibrator!". It would have taken the best comedy scriptwriters hours of brainstorming to come up with a line like that. I'd be happy to have her in my harem for a week.
ReplyDeleteIt's so funny how much you love that show. Trust me, that's nothing compared to Jersey Shore.
ReplyDelete@ Gorilla - I suppose, Gorilla, the burning questions is: with or without the vibrator? 8-/
ReplyDelete@ Jesse – Ha! I do love it…it was my secret guilty pleasure, but then I decided to blog about it (thanks for keeping my secret hun x). I tried to source the whole series of Jersey Shore on YouTube but I couldn't find it :'(